You'll have to excuse the title, but that is the repeating thought going through my head this week. We've had colds at our house and unfortunately Baker got one too. The poor guy has been stuffy and runny and coughy and wants to be held all of the time. And thankfully he is feeling better today- finally. BUT this is what my house has looked like all week. I've been walking around, holding a baby, watching my other kids burn the house to the ground. Kidding, sort of.
I said to Soren, "Why does God make us this way? Why do women crave order and cleanliness and organization and pretty things?!? But we also love babies and kids and those two things cannot coexist together! We're just doomed for frustration!!!"
And then I handed him the baby and put on my running shoes and headphones and left the house. I got out in the sunlight and got my heart beating and had a second to think. Alone. Oh, how I've missed running! Who knew that it could feel so good to do something you aren't in shape to do?
And I got my answer.
I was given that hope for perfect, orderly, pretty things because they are Godly. God is perfect and He wants us to have those things. But He also made me to be a mother and He wants me to raise messy little things and that means living in a mess. Humbly.
I learned that He wants me to lean on Him all day long, even when I have so many blessings and so many good things, He needs me to need Him. And its true. If I had my house in order and healthy kids and things stayed clean and orderly and I was on time places- I'm not sure I would feel a need to pray all day long. But I really, really, really do need His help to accept the mess and be happy in it.
I am happy. I have an awesome life. But I get frustrated and caught up in the little things and have bummer days just like the rest of the world. And I am learning to be grateful for those days because they keep me close to the One who is helping me become someone better.