ONE little MOMMA: The Things People Say When You Have a Bump

The Things People Say When You Have a Bump

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TEE- GAP // CLUTCH- Forever 21 // EARRINGS- N&S Woven Brown (large)

Things I've legitimately had said to me in the last few weeks.

"It's too bad you aren't having a girl."

"At least you already have everything. That's that good thing."

"First baby?" "Nope, fourth actually." "FOURTH?!?!"

"When I found out I was having my fourth boy I cried." 

I realized some of these comments weren't intended to be offensive- and everyone above was just trying to have a conversation with me. But there has got to be something else we can talk about. I'd prefer to hear something like "It's sure hot out today" or "What time is it?" than your commentary about my pregnancy. Feel free to being boring, not rude.

Nope, it's not too bad I'm not having a girl. I'm happy Knox will have his own little partner just like Easton and Kesler have each other.

No, I actually don't have everything I need already. Three boys have worn holes through everything that has been passed down- so I get to buy all new things for Boy #4. And that's fine.

Yes, I started having kids earlier than the new social norm and yes, it's possible I'm having my fourth. This is actually my fifth time being pregnant.

I'm really sorry to hear that you cried. I didn't. I'm feeling good about a healthy baby and I happen to love baby boys. Maybe we'll get a girl next time. 

I've written about my thoughts on having a fourth. Too bad I can't just print out copies and hand them out to all of my considerate commentators.

Oh, and I passed my glucose test yesterday. Thank goodness because I snuck a piece of toast before I took it! 

19 comments:

  1. right there with you! we just found out we're expecting baby boy #4 and I'm on pregnancy #7. I'm happy to have another boy, but oh the comments! lol

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  2. I have 4 as well, and the looks and comments I get about having 4...it gets exhausting!! But I just smile because that's all you can do sometimes! Boys love their mommy!! πŸ’™ Best of luck with #4!!

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  3. People have something to say no matter what. My husband and I have decided against having children and boy, you should hear the commentary we (mostly I) get! "That's...unnatural." "There must be something wrong with you." (Not to me, but behind my back to someone who felt it was their duty to tell me.) "Who's going to take care of you in your old age?" "Don't you want to give your husband a son to carry on his family name?" (What - is it 1500 and are we royalty? Nobody told me!) "Don't your parents want grandchildren?" "You'll change your mind." I never understood when and where our reproductive systems became public business...but it seems they are.

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  4. I can relate, I have 3 boys!! I've heard all of those comments too lol. Boys are awesome!
    you are adorable by the way!!

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  5. Kilee - I don't know if you'll remember me . . . we were in the same married student ward at BYU. I've never commented before, but I had to this time because I can relate to this post 100-percent. We also have four boys, and I'm always amazed by people's comments. They seem to be convinced that the only reason I wound up with four boys is because I just kept trying for a girl but unfortunately got pinned with another boy. Shortly before our fourth was born last year, I wrote a post about having four boys, and I thought you might appreciate it: http://www.sunlitpages.com/2014/05/on-having-four-boys.html

    Oh, and also, I agree with you that the comments about "at least you already have everything" are so funny and definitely spoken by people who do not have multiple boys. I basically can't pass down any shoes or pants to the next child.

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  6. Congrats on 4 boys! That is wonderful. I have 3 boys and wrote a piece for the Huffington Post: To the Mother of All Boys. I think you would enjoy reading it: http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/6991276

    Also, I just discovered your jewelry and I am smitten. (I have pair of earrings and 2 bracelets.) I would love to order more. Thanks for making such a great product. I am so glad my friend told me about you!

    Enjoy the rest of your pregnancy and your new baby boy when he comes!:) (Ignore all the goofy comments people make. Four boys is going to be so much fun!)

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  7. my first two were adopted... and of course, someone said, when I was pregnant with my 3rd child, but 2nd pregnancy (there was a miscarriage in there, also...)... "at least you are having one of your own"....
    yep... worst thing you can say to woman with adopted children...

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  9. While I agree that these comments aren't tasteful to the pregnant lady, or anyone for that matter, I'm sure you're right that these folks didn't have the intent to offend! People will be people, and we cant understand what drives people to say, or ask, the things they do. Turning the other cheek and avoiding sarcastic responses has always worked the best for me!

    Hope things brighten up for you. Boys are a riot of fun, aren't they? 😊

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  10. You look so cute pregnant! I have four girls and got a lot of those same comments.

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  11. My best friend has five boys and they have a ball!! I think it is wonderful. We have one daughter and I hear comments like "You cant have an only child" and why didn't you have more kids". and "She will never know how to get along with others". Very painful. No one means harm, but we tried for ten years. God has a great plan for all of our families. We have to be open to His plan. We are able to travel with our daughter and she is blessed to be able to travel for her dance. God will fill in all of the other holes(: Four boys will be wonderful. Enjoy! Susan

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  12. You go girl! I love this! Boys are the best! Of course i only have boys also so what do I know?☺ people are so funny, we just all want to share our wisdom and experience to bless and inform others. We just sometimes need to be positive and optimistic instead of so informational, especially when you are a complete stranger! My oldest boy is 13 months old and my baby is 6weeks old so you can imagine the comments i got carrying around a newborn/few month old baby with a pregnant belly. "Your life is going to be so difficult" "accidents happen" "you planned this?! Are you insane?!" No one knows the details of our lives like we do and why things happen or why we choose what we do. Its between us and God. The good thing that has come from other's rudeness or lack of tact is that it makes me want to be the happy person and the one with the kind words to say instead of criticism. I worked full time through my second pregnancy as a hygienist and saw a lot of people every day who knew i had just had a baby and felt they needed to inform me of the decrease in the quality of life coming way with the birth of my second child so close to the first. After hearing a lot of negative comments it sure was refreshing to hear someone say how awesome it will be to have two boys so close together to be such great friends. I'm excited for you and your four boys! I personally am hoping for a family of boys, I just love little boys�� so congratulations! Life is so great with my two little boys and i can only imagine it being that much more full with another two!

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  13. You go girl! I love this! Boys are the best! Of course i only have boys also so what do I know?☺ people are so funny, we just all want to share our wisdom and experience to bless and inform others. We just sometimes need to be positive and optimistic instead of so informational, especially when you are a complete stranger! My oldest boy is 13 months old and my baby is 6weeks old so you can imagine the comments i got carrying around a newborn/few month old baby with a pregnant belly. "Your life is going to be so difficult" "accidents happen" "you planned this?! Are you insane?!" No one knows the details of our lives like we do and why things happen or why we choose what we do. Its between us and God. The good thing that has come from other's rudeness or lack of tact is that it makes me want to be the happy person and the one with the kind words to say instead of criticism. I worked full time through my second pregnancy as a hygienist and saw a lot of people every day who knew i had just had a baby and felt they needed to inform me of the decrease in the quality of life coming way with the birth of my second child so close to the first. After hearing a lot of negative comments it sure was refreshing to hear someone say how awesome it will be to have two boys so close together to be such great friends. I'm excited for you and your four boys! I personally am hoping for a family of boys, I just love little boys�� so congratulations! Life is so great with my two little boys and i can only imagine it being that much more full with another two!

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  14. Congrats on 4 boys! Your post made me think of this picture on IG. When you are blessed with a little girl someday, she will be so lucky :) https://instagram.com/p/2sG4QsLwkN/

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  15. Ugh, some people *eye roll*.

    We have an only child, a wonderful son. You can probably imagine the comments and horror stories we heard about only children (most of it complete bunk, btw) back when he was younger. I finally got fed up and started filling these commenters in on my 4 miscarriages and 1 ectopic pregnancy. That shut them up FAST. Again, some people.

    Blessing to You!

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  16. Totally agree! I have 4 boys and then had a girl. When people found out my fourth was another boy I think they thought I was sad and depressed. It was like I had to apologize for having so many boys. My boys are the best and craziest things to ever happen to me. I am one of 5 girls with no brothers so the boy world was new to me. I love my daughter...the baby of the fam but the boys keep me laughing !

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