ONE little MOMMA: Honest- The Stuggle to Be Authentic

Honest- The Stuggle to Be Authentic

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Every once and a while on my blog,  I'll share what I call an 'honest post.' Not to say that I'm not honest in all of my posts, but sometimes I just need to be MORE honest. Usually I am sharing something that I have been struggling with or feel like being real about. I've written about having a mean face, pregnancy weight gain struggles, and the birth of our third son. Today I'm here with another honest post.

I have struggled with self love for most of my life and that has shown itself in different ways. I have been shy, struggled with an eating disorder and even struggled with having real relationships. I've also held myself back from doing the things that I really wanted. I know this is common for a lot of women. Just in the last year do I feel like I have been conquering some of these demons and as a result feeling so much more confident, happy and yes, even pretty.


Two years ago- trying to model an outfit feeling SO insecure in front of the camera


What has changed things for me? I was introduced to a book called "The Gifts of Imperfection" by Brene Brown. I deeply identified with almost everything in the book. It was like she wrote it for me! I learned a lot about why I have always struggled to feel confident in myself. A big part of that was realizing that because I didn't believe in my own self worth, I was always hustling for other people's approval. Sound familiar? 

The answer to stopping that cycle was/is a tough one. Authenticity. Yes, that sounds intense, but hear me out. I started by making authenticity my number one goal in situations where I felt insecure. I found that if my goal was to be authentic all of the time and no one liked me- then I was still successful and my confidence increased. On the opposite end, if my goal was to be liked and no one liked me, then I would feel like a failure and I continued to feel worth less. 

So I tried it and guess what? It works. I am so proud of myself when I am open and honest in any situation, that it doesn't matter how anything else turns out. The highest compliment to me now is to be told that I am 'real.' In the past I loved hearing how cute my outfit was or how well I did something, but now it just feels good to be real. 


Today- feeling good in my skin

Being authentic is all about letting people see your inner beauty. At one point growing up I had the thought that I hoped nothing terrible ever happened to my physical appearance because then what would I have? I really thought that no one would want to be my friend or like me if I didn't have my looks. What a tragic thought! No one should ever think that. I hope that my attempts to be real will encourage others to be themselves too. 

What can you do to be more authentically you today?


12 comments:

  1. Thank you so much for sharing this! I was talking about struggling with some of these things in my life last night! Your post was so encouraging!

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  2. What a great post! You are such a blessing. I struggle with this.

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  3. Well I've only known you 2 months, but I totally feel like what you see is what you get! Beautiful inside and out!

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  4. Love this post. Think it's refreshing for people to show their real lives on social media rather than just the edited versions. My post today is a little too honest probably. :) Nice to meet you this week!

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  5. such a good post. i struggle with many of the same insecurities. you do look waaaay more comfortable in the second picture, by the way. ;)

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  6. Great post! Thank you! Isn't it amazing what a GREAT accessory,self confidence is?! It can make a whole outfit sparkle! Keep sparkling, Kilee!

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  7. I just found this quote and it made me think of your post:


    "Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else." ~Judy Garland

    Lovely, isn't it?

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  8. What a great post! I think this is an issue that every woman struggles with. Myself included! I love seeing the transformation between those two photos...keep letting your light shine! You are beautiful!

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  9. Your honesty is refreshing, Kilee! Thanks for being real.

    Whitney

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  10. Kilee- Thank you for getting a little personal and keepin' it real. I went out and bought the book and it's helped me so much with the anxiety I was experiencing with my new job. It's also helped me cope with an inferiority complex that I've struggled with since I was a child (I'm 37 now). Thank you for the ray of hope and kindness you brought to my life. Best wishes and blessings, Emma P.s. I also love all your outfits and especially how you pair clothes with scarfs. :)

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Thank you so much for taking time to comment!